Never write from Mister Sad

Mr. Sad is here. Sad because there are two main mode. One is living. You eat a chocolate. The other is searching for meaning.

And there is no meaning.

So just passing the time then. How can Jim Carrey be so enthusiastic like a kid. This is the real magic. I started listening to Chet Baker, but couldn’t. Changed to Mazzy Star, Bonnie Prince Billy. Still not sad enough.

Mark Kozelek… no. Reggie Watts. Funny.

what am I doing here? i am unable to write. who am I kidding. auto correct, please complete what I wanted to write.

There once was a someone and he wanted to be a writer so he bought a computer with internet connection built in. That mother fucker tries to write but he couldn’t. So he bought an app he saw in a commercial that promised to do all the hard writing. So he opened a google document and tried one last attempt to write. When that didn’t help he tried to activate the addon he downloaded. He interfered. life. I can feel that today I won’t be able to write the thousand words. I hadn’t read what was yesterday.

Nothing stops me as I read. I need someone to bold the important things. Lets open my google notes see what I wrote. oh smart one. I just have to write every impulse I have.

When I met Jonathan smith. can’t fucking remember. What use is there for life if you cant remember. Let’s try. It started with a phone call.

“hey man how’s it going?”

“man I work a lot in marketing and advising I make a shitload of money you know I started helping this company out they create fake meat. They invite me to lectures and shit. I say sure. They bring me in a room and tell me go and I just do my creative thing. I give them an idea that solves all their issue. Jonathan you genius you just solved a problem I needed for months.

Wait, stop man. I don’t buy it and I don’t care.

What do you mean you don’t buy it? come join me for a day.

So I joined Jonathan for a week, not just one day. I would tell my wife that I am going to the office when in fact I drove to jonathan’s house. he had a great looking house. great looking wife too. it was designed like an American sorority house. It had baseballs and posters, a wall of bricks, basketball in the middle of the house. cute stuffed animals were placed like ornaments throughout the house. There was a huge glass door going around half of the house. I knocked. his wife answered wearing a robe. hey you must be jonathan’s friend. He’s in the pool.

She leads me to outside. Where Jonathan is sitting in the pool with a margarita enjoying himself in the middle of the morning.

hey man, I can’t believe this is my job, I just made a grand here, doing nothing.